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Showing posts with the label Humor Quotient

Some days are just blah!

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It starts with a small itchy sensation in your nose and a scratchy feeling in your throat. You sneeze a few times and blame it on the dust and pollution and carry on with your day. You sniffle a few times and think that it will go away on its own. Such dumb thoughts lull you into a sense of security and you sleep off thinking tomorrow is a new day. Next day dawns and the scratchy feeling that you happily ignored is making your throat hurt like hell. The only consolation is that you now have a voice that is a cross between a squeak and a roar, which you plan to call husky. Your friends ask you to verify your identity because you sound "kind off weird","like Marlon Brando in Godfather". Any man would have given his left arm for such a compliment, but you just fume. You tell them they are jealous because your voice sounds sexy. You hear raucous laughter when you say that and even though you angrily want to bang the phone down, you stop yourself. You look at the d

Open letter to everyday super Idiots

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Dear Super Idiots, Everyday, while driving and even walking around the city, I come across people like you, who think they are God’s gift to humanity. Your arrogant attitude and non sense driving skills has prompted me to write this open letter. Yoo-hoo!! guys, you know who you are and hope you are reading this.I know that deep in your heart you do want to follow traffic rules, but again breaking rules is a matter of pride for you. You still think that being a rebel is in, and have taken it to heart. The other day, I was in a great mood and was on my way to do some shopping. I was waiting patiently for the signal to turn Green. There were only a few seconds remaining for the light to turn Green, 12,11,10 the seconds ticked away. At that moment, I felt that I was standing at a Derby with restless horses ready to start galloping, the moment the doors are thrown open. I suddenly see you and your friends starting to drive ahead in the incoming traffic just like untamed horses in the win

Are you listening?

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These past few years have changed me as a person. I was someone, who could talk a lot and have a conversation with anyone, on any topic. But now, I am unsure about making conversations and try to listen more rather than speak. In this entire process of learning to listen more and speak less, I came across a lot of specimens who had some distinct qualities that could be neatly categorised into sections. I too have been a part of some categories at one point of time and so can easily identify the symptoms that plague them. They  all practice the art of listening at different levels. You too can easily identify them, they are all around us. 1) The Motor Mouth : This class of people can be identified by the endless talk coming out of their mouth. They have a perpetual verbal diarrhoea and cannot keep from talking on all topics right from their cat to their cousin’s aunt’s nephew’s neighbour. They don’t even take a pause to breathe and can comfortably keep talking for hours at end. The

Humour in Pictures

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They say a picture is worth a thousand words so instead of belting out thousand words I will let the pictures do the talking . Have a great day. Via

People say the Darnedest Things

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Sometimes normal people like us forget that we can be stupid too and end up saying the most ridiculous things. There is nothing wrong in asking stupid questions but some of them surely crack me up and most times I have to bite my tongue to stop myself from giving a really sarcastic retort.  Here are some gems I could recall : 1) I am an ex-dog owner and my pooch was a harmless Labrador with a goofy smile on his face. I understand that not everybody is a Dog lover and are scared of dogs but inevitably all will ask me this question 'Does he Bite?'. I just had to keep a straight face and say 'No he is a sweet dog'. Things going around in my brain(TGAIMB) - Yes if you put a penny in his ear and press his nose, he will start biting. He takes pleasure in biting random people everyday and that is why we love him so much. 2) You are fast asleep and some enthusiastic bugger has started his/her day early and wants to spread the cheer around will call you at a really unear

Some Other Dude Did It

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I swear, 'Some other Dude did it'(SODDI), I was not even there, I have been framed. This is a conspiracy and now I will be called a cold-hearted killer. Oh! have I lost you? Hang on, as the mystery unfolds...  One morning as I stepped in the bath tub to have a shower I was greeted by a many legged guest who looked like a younger brother to the picture below and was trying to oust me from my own bathtub by scurrying hither thither. I don't take kindly to such behavior and so I blasted the poor guy with a jet of hot water and totally drowned the sucker. His death was quick and hopefully painless.  But now, I am being haunted by his death, I have nightmares in which  hundreds of his relatives are out to attack me and some of them are vicious and look like this.   The nightmare starts with a cold dark night. As I am running through the forest, I hear leaves rustle, I turn to see a giant Spider running towards me. I am running with my heart pounding and I see more and more